We unveiled our RPM Awards in the November issue of Maxim, featuring the seven of the sweetest rides 2008 has to offer. The Honor Roll is the best of the rest…

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ACHIEVEMENT IN PARTY-ENABLING TECHNOLOGY

2009 Dodge Ram
Chrysler engineers must have an Old School DVD looping in their cubicles: They’ve converted the walls of the new Dodge Ram truck bed into drain-plug-equipped coolers that can hold 120 12-ounce cans and ice. Somebody’s even been watching porn: They’ve named the feature “RamBox.”

PEDESTRIAN PRESERVATION BMW
Night Vision
If poky bipeds in front of you don’t have the decency to scream, “I’m walkin’ here!” BMW’s Night Vision—an option offered on the 7 Series—helps keep road kill counts low by scanning ahead and warning you of any hapless humans in your way.

BEST CONCIERGE FOR NON-ARISTOCRATS
Ford Sirius Travel Link
If you’re buying a Ford, you’re probably not a Rockefeller, but you can play one with this add-on. The politely obedient navigation/info system delivers weather maps, sports scores, and movie times with nary a sniff; it even fills you in on nearby gas prices.

TREND THAT MUST END AWARD
Mechaphilia
Lots of men love cars, but 57-year-old Washington resident Edward Smith is the Gene Simmons of sheet metal, since he’s claimed to have made love to roughly 1,000 cars—including his current flame, a VW Beetle named Vanilla. Smith is profiled in a British documentary called Strangelove that gives new meaning to the phrase “auto erotica.”

THE STICK-TO-IT-IVENESS AWARD
2009 Dodge Viper ACR
The ACR pairs the Viper’s 600 hp V-10 with a crazy aero package. The result: 1,000 pounds of downforce at 150 mph. You’ll stick to the tarmac like your sneakers to the peep-show-booth floor.

FASTEST FAMILY CAR 2009
Cadillac CTS-V
Big, bad Caddies used to be reserved for Mob heavies and bookies, but the supercharged 550 hp CTS-V ($60K est.) attracts a whole different breed: the speed freak who wants horsepower under the hood and a kiddie seat in back.

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